So This is The New Year…
…and I don’t feel any different.
Mmm. Love me some Death Cab for Cutie! Anyway — yes. It’s 2013. WEIRD, right? When I was a kid I thought in 2013 we’d have flying cars and stuff. Shows you what a child of the nineties knew. 13 is generally considered an unlucky number but I have a feeling it might be a little better than 2012. 2012 had a solid good three months in the summer, but for the most part it was just a lot of drama and weirdness and being tired. It *did* teach me a lot, and it *did* hand me an acceptance letter I had been waiting for and it *did* bring a lot of great accomplishments and excitement for those close to me.
Last year I put down my “resolutions” here, and I thought I’d go over them and see what I did resolve to do, and which I completely chucked out the window. The resolutions were as follows:
1. Exercise at least five days a week.
2. Be kinder, especially to family members.
4. Be more selfless.
5. Make new friends.
Ok, so did I follow those? Not all. But some!
1. I definitely didn’t exercise at least five days a week. There were a lot of weeks I did none at all. To put it bluntly, I blew this one big time. Bad, B!
2. I definitely succeeded in this. My patience was exercised a lot this year but I definitely built stronger and better relationships with family members. Instead of wanting to immediately blow up when irritated, I’m learning to just roll with it. In the end, it saves a lot of drama.
3. Travel, oh travel…you were completely lost on me this year. I ended up cancelling the one trip I had planned in the beginning of 2012 for a few reasons and I definitely regret it. The farthest I traveled was to the Gorge. Being at the gorge was amazing, but I definitely planned to go farther. L.A., San Fran, NYC, Chicago…I’ll get to you eventually.
4. I also think I accomplished being more selfless. I made an effort to do nice things for others when I could and anytime something good came to me, I did my best to “pay it forward”. Doing things like this make you feel so much better about yourself and what you’re doing. It also restores your faith in people when you see it come back to you.
5. This last one makes me laugh. Within the first six months of the year I had essentially gained a new group of friends centered around already close friends. At the end of the year I had completely lost them. Am I sad? No. Most of the reason they’re gone is because I decided they needed to be. See, the older I get the less tolerant I become of people’s antics. I make mistakes, and I fully admit to my mistakes but when people do hurtful things behind your back instead of being honest with you about it — that’s a problem. I am far too old to keep people in my life who are one way to my face, which allows me to trust them, and then try to ruin my life behind my back. At 24 (almost 25) it’s disgusting to even think about meddling in others business, but when grown men older than me are doing it then forget it. I am not going to spend my time trying to make an effort to be friends with people who only pretend to be my friend. I’m not in high school anymore.
Because I’m still in school and balancing that with work, I’m sure 2013 will bring a few more rollercoasters, but at least I’m learning to manage them better and know when to just walk away. I’m becoming stronger as a person and I’m really proud of myself for that. I’m still going to try to keep the resolution to travel, and modifying the exercise resolution by running a 5k and trying to drop 4 pant sizes by next NYE (I definitely think this one is attainable within one year), continue to be kinder, be selfless (but ALSO put me first when it comes to personal goals and my health: mental & physical), and make new friends.
I’ll leave you with my personal anthem for 2013 – Anything Could Happen!