Drunk or Kid: Answers and Explanations

A few days ago I posted up my very own version of HIMYM’s “Drunk or Kid” game but using my nephews as the kids and me as the drunk.  Here are the answers and explanations.

Scene 1: Puked in the car at the beginning of a long drive, making everyone else suffer for the entire ride with the horrible stench despite cleaning most of it up.

Answer: Nephew.  It was 7AM and we were heading up the mountains for the five hour drive it takes to get to his house.  He wouldn’t eat and all he had to drink that morning was milk.  Half-way up the mountain pass, he started puking it all up (So, sooo disgusting).  Up on pass roads, there aren’t a lot of places to pull off so we had to drive while he puked for a few minutes until we could finally pull over by a river. It was cold and raining but nonetheless I yank my nephew out of his car seat as he’s sobbing (I thought I was going to cry for him, too!) and headed to the trunk to strip him down and get new clothes on him.  His poor little almost-3 year old body shivering, crying saying “I’m cold!”.  It was terrible.  I wrapped him up in my hello kitty fleece blanket, plopped him in the front seat with a box of crackers (now he was smiling) while we cleaned up his car seat as much as we could.But it still stunk the whole ride. Never giving that child milk on a road trip again.

Scene 2: Went into the bathroom to hide in the shower to wait for someone to come in and scare them right as they’re mid-pee.

Answer: Me.  I did this at countless parties with people I used to work with.  I still want to laugh when I think about peoples faces and reactions.

Scene 3: Decided it would be a good idea to lay down next to the road and pretend to be dead.

Answer:  Nephews.  Not a good idea.

Scene 4: Sit outside a public restroom stomping feet and screaming in anger.

Answer:  Though it sounds like something I might do drunk, it was a nephew.

Scene 5: Got violently angry after puking in a parking lot because someone threw away said violent person’s beverage while said person puked.

Answer: Me.  After downing a bunch of vodka AND rum pre-func’ing at a friends house, I decided to drink a can of Sparks in the car on our way out.  I suddenly felt sick and puked in the parking lot of our destination.  When I was done I asked “Hey, where’s my Sparks? I’m not done!!!” and anger ensued when I found out it was dumped.

Scene 6: Decided it would be a good idea to put one of their hands on a charcoal barbecue grill grate, then sat bawling as someone ran their hand under cold water.

Answer:  Me.  To be completely honest, I don’t remember so much the hand on the grill part as I do standing at the sink while a tiny Asian girl tried running my hand under cold water while I cried.  And the mark on my hand the next morning.

Scene 7: Ran around with bottoms off screaming “I feel so free!!!”

Answer:  Nephew.  But I did say the same thing while skinny dipping with a few friends – completely sober.

Scene 8: Cried and begged when everyone wanted to leave — not quite ready to finish game that was being played.

Answer:  Me.  Why do I always cry/threaten people with cry when I drink?  I just wanted to finish that round of pool!

Scene 9: Stuck food in pants so it wouldn’t have to be eaten.

Answer:  TRICK QUESTION.  We both have!  My youngest nephew always used to stick fruit in his diapers that he didn’t want to eat.  One time, while drunk, a friend tried to get me to eat a piece of bread.  When she turned away I shoved the piece of bread down the back of my jeans (outside undies, no worries!) and told her I ate it.  I still got sick.

I didn’t get drunk this weekend (I barely do anymore, let alone drink), but I had a great one.  Hope you all did, too!  Cheers!

 

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