He’ll Get Here, When He Gets Here.
Hi! I’m B! I’m a spinster!
Okay, I’m not really a spinster, but I have been single for about 4 years now. OK, that isn’t completely honest either. The truth of the matter is, I’ve spent the last 4 years dating people people here and there but have yet to settle into a long term relationship. After so many years, I was feeling like I needed to get serious about finding a “boyfriend”. I mean, it’s time right? A lot of my close friends, if they aren’t in long-term relationships already are starting to enter into them. Ex boyfriends and girls I was friends with in high school are starting to get married and even have babies! So, feeling the pressure I naturally start putting myself out there – looking for guys when I go out, having my friends set me up, and even maintaining an active online dating account.
A few weeks ago, I went on a date with a guy who had messaged me online. Before we went out, we exchanged phone numbers and spent the days leading up to the date text messaging back and forth. Overall, the date went well. We went to dinner and spent a good couple of hours talking after we had finished eating. We shared stories, made each other laugh and found out we had more in common than we thought. But that was that. After the date was over, it was like out-of-sight, out-of-mind. Why did I not care of this person liked me or not? Why did I not care if he wanted to go on a second date? Why didn’t I care to see a good looking guy who I got along with and seemed to have an interest in me, again?
That’s when I fully started to realize why despite my efforts, I haven’t cared – I’ve been looking for a relationship for all the wrong reasons. Just because it’s been a while and just because it seems like the social norm to try to find a boyfriend and just because my good friends are attached or trying to find someone for themselves does not mean I have to.
I guess I’ll just take the advice of every person before me and accept that no matter how I feel about dating or not dating, that the right person will 1) make me want to date when I find them and 2) Accept my crazy and 3) get here when he gets here, at just the moment he was supposed to. (If anyone watches HIMYM, cue: Season 4, Episode 23: “As Fast as She Can” for a scene that literally makes me tear up for ol’ Ted).
But future “Mr. Right” should know the Type-A, planning freak side of me just wants to at least know ETA so I can stop worrying about it. Is that so much to ask!?