Facebook Ruins Birthdays

Back when I was in grade-high school, I had always referred to this week as “birthday week” because, excepting my birthday on the 11th, there were at least two birthdays every day from the 7th to the 14th. Besides that crazy week, there were numerous other birthdays scattered around the month. There were always a shitload of February birthdays.  (That clash in the middle of June of Spring Fever + Summer Lovin’ must have gotten the best of all our parents!…OK, gross).

At age 24 (almost), I’m no stranger to older people practically scolding me wondering how I even survived without the technology they didn’t have. How did you ever meet up with people without those phones? What did you ever do to pass time before the internet consumed all you youngin’s lives? My only answers can be “I don’t know. Let me consult my smart phone! Or tablet. Or laptop that I carry with me everywhere! Oh, there’s also my work laptop too?”

But seriously, I DO remember a time when we actually called people up (or at least texted!) to say happy birthday! None of this Facebook Wall shit that has become the new phone call.

What’s more — is that Facebook has taken it ONE MORE STEP into the lazy-zone.  Not only are the daily birthdays proudly displayed on the side bar, but if you click that sidebar, it gives you a little box to write your “OMG Happy Birthday!!!!!!” comment there! You can get all your birthday well-wishing done in one place.  Seriously!? You don’t even need to visit a person’s page to wish them a happy birthday anymore? Are you KIDDING me!?

Then, when it is your birthday, you want to cuss out all those bastards that you know did NOT know it was your birthday and are doing it because Facebook told them to. “Why don’t you wish Missy Muffin a happy birthday?”  Sure, I haven’t seen her since high school and I really didn’t even like her then, but why the hell not!? When it’s not your birthday and you’re wishing someone else a happy day, you always want to note — *and I knew it without Facebook’s help, bitch! Maybe that’s just me.

I may be a part of this “Gen-Y” or “Millennial” generation, but there are certainly some things I still value – like a phone call or a card to say happy birthday, instead of one that can be sent while someone sits on their ass in between a YouTube of a laughing baby and a HowTo: Not to Suck at Life page. Hell, even an extended email or text wouldn’t hurt.  At least people would be momentarily teared away from their precious Facebook pages, right?

Let’s not even get into the fact it makes us lazy about even spending time with people we haven’t seen in a while without any motive to get into and bomb their Facebook photos.  That’s another day worth of ranting.

But then, there are those people who ignore the falsity of it all and actually feel loved for one day in their life because Facebook told all their friends that they don’t see anymore that it was their birthday. Because all of those almost-strangers wished them a happy birthday, their birthday was not ruined. And because I made fun of them, now a total of 2 people are going to say Happy Birthday on my Facebook page.

That’s right, Karma transcends Facebook because it’s easier that way, too.

Are you with me about this or do you welcome this new wave of laziness??

4 thoughts on “Facebook Ruins Birthdays

    • Yeah, and I think that goes right into the laziness aspect. Like, I’ll talk to you when Facebook asks me too, but normally I don’t really care and wouldn’t know when your birthday is.

      But whatever they want to do to make themselves feel better, I could care less. If I hated them that much, they wouldn’t be on my friend list.

  1. I’m generally phone-adverse and birthday-apathetic so I fall squarely into the Facebook birthday target audience. The fact is that I don’t even know most of the people on my Facebook anymore. When The birthday wishes start rolling in I like to play “who the hell is THAT” and then check my mutual friends to figure it out. It becomes more fun when the betting starts.

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